How much is in the mind?

Recently, I've been thinking about something. When we cannot seem to do anything right, has it got to do with...

- nature and nuture?
- strengths and weaknesses?
- weak will?
- poor faith in God? (trials?)
- stress?

When I think back, I realised that there were some things I had not really ruminate about. Since my education in secondary school, I decided to studied for the glory of God and I want to do my best for Him. Yet, it seemed that there were certain preconceptions which hindered me from reaching my full potential as a student and probably even was a servant of God.

Of course, it would be good to have all the 'A's. However, my discouraging encounters with my academic subjects might have narrowed my achievements while I walk down my education path. I might have subconsciously told myself, "My GP can't make it. My knowledge on Economics can't make it. You are always struggling with them. You know it. "

Of course, it would be good if I have the ability to teach. However, my expectations might have limited my exposure to teaching itself. I might have subconsciously told myself, "Look at yourself. You should know that you are poor in speech. Don't think about teaching already. Move on to better things, Daniel. "

It's really scary the way this thoughts wriggle into my life undetected. But I am glad that I've come to see this 'worms' messing with in my mind and my life. Come to think about it, God tried to overthrow these assumptions. He left me puzzled with my distinction for H1 Economics. He made Moses speak to Pharaoh.

All I need is probably more courage and training for public speaking. Then again, maybe I find that being a messenger of truth is an overwhelming calling. I am handling the weighty truth with my body and mind! And that's got to leave me... with fear and trembling.

Nevertheless, I know God seeks to develop my full potential and I'll have to get the best of myself for Him.